Skip to main content

"leave me right here cuz I don't wanna go"

Current mood: sad Category: Life
Well, we're moving...moving in with Davey's parents. The reason before anyone jumps to conclusions is because they have a huge house, they're never there, and asked us to move in with them. Also, although we are financially sound right now, we will be able to save more money while living with them to get a new car and a bigger house....so it's all very positive. Except for me.
I'm having a hard time--a really hard time. I mean, this house is where Davey and I had a lot of firsts. And where we brought our children home to, where they took their first steps, have had all their birthday parties, and cut their first teeth, had their first big-girl or big-boy bedroom, learned all about everything....so far. I'm very sad about leaving. We'll still own this house but other people will be making their memories here and of course we'll make memories somewhere else....but this is our first house...an we've been through a lot here, happy and sad, good and bad.
And then there's Beth....my neighbor and one of my very best friends. We can call each other whenever and just run out the front door and talk or hang out. Or you know, the typical neighborly thing, if I'm missing an ingredient for dinner or she is, we just call and run next door....Our kids love each other and love having their best buddies right next door. I have Trip, who's 4; she has Gabriel and Noah, who are 3; and then I have Genna-Clair, who's 2. So far they've grown up together and are so used to having one another.....it's just going to be really hard during the transition.....I know that we'll always be friends...it's just the fact that we aren't gonna be right next door anymore.
I have a lot to be sad about, but I also have a lot to look forwatd to and be proud of. I mean we made it!! We have 2 kids that hae grown up so far in this house, they're happy, healthy, well-behaved...and Davey and I are happier than ever. One day...maybe a year or two from now, we'll have a new house that's just ours again, that we love and can raise our family in. Growing up is tough....but it's worth it. I'm so blessed to have such a wonderful husband--I wouldn't want to "grow up" with anyone else. He's amazing and brave and so much stronger than I am about everything. Starting a new chapter is always tough, but so exciting at the same time. I'm eager to see what's next, and trying to remember to take things one day at a time.
My mom gave me this magnet a few years ago, when we were facing some other really tough issues:
Faith is knowing that the darkest day will always be followed by the sunshine and joy of God's love.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Aha!

I DID post more blog installments, only on a different blog. Some of my posts were of a bitter, angry, "everything is unfair" type....but know that I'm over it all now. The people it involves are much loved and all has been forgiven. (Well, the family stuff anyway) lol So...I did, I did, I did post more!! See!!?? And reading back through a lot of it is very painful...because I know what was going on behind the words typed there. Anyway, there's some background of me, and whats gone on in my life the last 2-3 years or so...well, some of it. A Little South of Sanity Great name, huh? I just didn't think I could link to it. :)

baby names

Well I said before that if this baby is a boy, its name would be Davin---Davey decided he doesn't really like that name very much and gave me a really good reason why, so I've decided that its okay NOT to use that name.... A little girl will be Ella or Ellie, and I'm keeping the name we've chosen for a boy kinda quiet except to close friends and relatives that I can trust not to say ugly things.... As far as my immediate family (mom dad siblings etc...) the baby will be Harry or Sue. lol I'm not telling them another thing because they've been so rude about it. Its my baby and if I want to name it Prudence or Darwin or Nancy or John or whatever,  I will! (I don't like those names, btw...lol) In other words....people need to keep their comments to themselves. just like with TRIP I will call my child what I want to, like it or not.

Reviving the Writer

... Deciding to revive a once-lost memory is intimidating. The will to bare your thoughts, sometimes unedited, for public viewing, conjures images of hiding behind my mother's dress at church -just to get a good peek at things before edging into view.  If only writing gave us at least that safety net.  A conversation with a friend inspired this post, a decade after shutting down and retreating to small blurbs on social media.  I asked why she hasn't 'written that book.' You know, when judging others, you're just asking to be judged yourself--and our toughest judge typically is our own inner voice. Henceforth, I have determined that on this day, in order to practice what I speak, in absolute protest against my tendency to imposter syndrome, I'll be writing again.  It isn't that I stopped communicating but I stopped sharing my thoughts so openly.  I'll update the happenings of the past decade and plan a fresh look to this space.  Everchanging, Kristen